Tag Archives: #discipline

Parenting

3 Ways to Create Healthy Emotional Atmosphere for Your Child

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Family discussions, with old and young alike taking part, can be as stimulating as sparks that ignite a fire. – Spanish saying

1) Every Child Is Born With the Growing Desire to Discover the Unknown 

Curiosity governs his actions and you need to satisfy it and help it to develop into a conscious longing to learn, that in later years will determine his success in life. He perceives you as a magician that knows everything and has numerous wonders. 

You reach into your bag, take out the phone and put it to your ear and listen and talk back, you put it back and grab a bottle of water, put it on the table and place a cookie on it that you just pulled from the same charmed sack. Don’t be surprised when this little adventurer approaches your bag as soon as you put it down and starts his discovery process, taking everything out and examining every object. Let him satisfy his curiosity, when he is done he probably won’t disturb the contents of it anymore.

But if he continues to do so every time you leave the room or just turn around, and you can tell that now it is a mere play – not curiosity; then you can show him a sign of your disapproval.

2) Be Careful When Distinguishing Between Curiosity and Misbehaving 

He is a smart little guy and will read the expression on your face: knitted eyebrows and stiff lips. If you are careful when distinguishing between curiosity and misbehaving, you will reap the fruits of your efforts soon enough. One day traveling you visit a wonderful ancient church with colorful frescos, golden candelabras, and stained glass windows. You come a bit earlier to have enough time to wander around and then to listen to the organ music. Your son will look around with his eyes wide open and a smile on his face, taking time to examine each painting.

When you quietly call him to have a seat beside you he will show ‘behavioral discipline’ and sit beside you and listen with you, maybe still occasionally looking around. You did a great job thinking ahead and coming earlier to give him time to contemplate the beauty of the place.

You may see another family with kids. They came just in time to sit down and listen to the music. The mother keeps reproaching the kids for not sitting still. The father may threaten them with what he may do when they leave the place. And the little ones try to obey and hide the burning desire to look around and see what is on that wall behind them and the one on the left, and to learn why there are multiple colors and sun comes through the windows in rainbow-like rays. These kids will get used to bottling their emotions up to save themselves from scolding.

3) Create Emotional Freedom in Your House

Your effort will determine your future success as a parent and you will be proud of your children. Discipline is important. The goal is to create true harmony between the emotional world and conscience.

If you govern in your household by the rules you never explain properly so that little soul may understand and admit them – you teach external discipline – one without understanding. Kids will obey because of fear of punishment, not because they internally comprehend the importance and meaning of these rules. And when the very person who introduced the rules is gone, the kids won’t follow them anymore – there will be no threat to force them to do so.

But if you take time to explain every disciplinary action to your child in a way so that his conscience will recognize and acknowledge it – whatever happens in the future, with you beside him or when you are gone – his conscience will remind him the good and bad, true and false, love and hate.

Conclusion

Conscience is the most sensitive scale that perfectly distinguishes between right and wrong. Be an example of a principled centered life, governed by your conscience and this way you will teach your child to balance the emotional world with the help of internal discipline. Sooner or later the time will come when only those treasures will help him to be a good person. Make sure you supply him with all he needs and you will be proud of your child for making this world a better place. 

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Parenting

3 Tips to Build Confidence in Your Child

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One of the luckiest things that can happen to you in life is, I think, to have a happy childhood. – Agatha Christie

1) To Build Confidence in Your Child Is to Add a Building Block to the House of Human Dignity

You should take charge of a very important place in your child’s emotional world – a place of honesty and persistence. This will help to shape a sensitive and at the same time, a powerful personality. Do you want to raise a child that depends on you or do you want to bring up a resolute strong character? To do so you need to work on your character first and foremost. If you are brave and honest – this task is for you.

2) To Raise a Submissive Child Is a Mistake Easily Made

Some people perceive weakness and want to raise a submissive child. In this case, the little girl at some point forgets how to show her real feelings as she gets so used to pleasing her parents for the love they give. She may lose the connection with her true inner spirit and will wear a mask all her life without even realizing it. Do you need a child that hides herself from you and from the outside world? This way you may never say that you know who she truly is, and you don’t know what to expect from her. The time comes and we all lose that connection with our parents either for a while or forever and then the main role in our life is taken by ‘society’: friends, coworkers and so on. Now you cannot predict how her character will shift to please other people around her, whom she considers more important at this point in her life.

3) Parenting Is a Never-Ending Learning Process for Both Parents and Kids

We all lead by example and this is the most important thing to remember in raising a child. Parenting is a never-ending learning process for both parties: parents and kids. Your child may teach you many things. And the most important here is your desire to open your heart and read the words of true love inscribed in it.

Conclusion

Love yourself as you are and love your child unconditionally. Be open to exploring your true emotional world so you can become sensitive to your baby’s sacred needs. Your goal is to grow genuine admiration, when a child is obedient because she trusts and respects her parents and not because of fear.

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Parenting

5 Parenting Tips That Will Secure Present and Future Happiness of Your Child

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Blessed is the home where each puts the other’s happiness first. – Anonymous

1) The Spiritual Bond Between the Baby and His Mother 

The mother’s body is like a tranquil old-fashioned clock that soothingly counts out heartbeats. For nine months a baby lives in this dark peace. The mother should try her best to stay calm and avoid any distractions that may disturb her peace. The spiritual bond between the baby and his mother is so strong that it continues after the birth of the baby for 4 more years. This little body feels safe in his mother’s presence and scared of the world full of unfamiliar sounds when she is not around.

2) The Gentle and Deliberate Motion of a Child’s Life

The pace with which the clock ticks governs the gentle and deliberate motion of a child’s life. He eats slowly, tasting the food; takes time to dress and tie his shoes – don’t hasten this learning process. Life shouldn’t be about speed, unfortunately, we tend to exhibit little patience as we are always in a hurry. That causes stress. We need to slow down and at the very least let our kids live life the way their internal clock tells them to. The natural flow of life, unhurried and consistent should be respected.

3) Let Your Child Experience Life in Small but Meaningful Ways 

Let him get cold so he knows why he needs to put on several layers of clothes, let him get hungry so he wants and asks for food. By chasing your child with a spoon in one hand and an extra pair of socks in another you won’t show him the reasons behind your actions. Let him understand things around him.

4) The Desire to Learn as It Is a Distinctive Feature of Human Beings

A child is naturally curious and it is important not to damage this desire to learn as it is a distinctive feature of human beings. When forced to learn something, children behave like adults. When you are told to submit a paper on a topic you are quite interested in under a threat of some kind, will you enjoy the process or will you experience stress and resentment? Children feel the same and by constantly forcing them by whip and candy, their curiosity may vanish. Then we witness a child with a learning disability. And the reason is simply a disturbance in the natural flow of things. They wonder “why” – encourage them to explore further under your supervision.

5) In a Child’s World, Everything Is Real 

A friend can be a giant lion, which lets him ride on its back, or a small kitten, that he holds in his tiny hands and feeds with imaginary water. Their imaginations are vivid and realistic, senses are sharp, and beliefs shaped and shaken by parents. Be careful what you tell your children and what you want them to accept as truth. They feel any false note, but they trust you fully so they think “it is the way it should be since mom deceives me in this way, it is “OK” for me to do the same”. You tell your little girl that the sweet piece of cake you eat and that looks so inviting is a harsh remedy that the doctor prescribed, and it is not tasty at all, on the contrary – it is very sour and bitter. You try to protect your little princess from the allergic reaction she has on her lovely skin each time she eats too much sugary stuff, so you invent this “white lie”. Next time you playfully ask her to share a little piece of an apple that you’ve just given her, she tells you that it is not good for you and you may cough if you eat it. Oh! How skillfully they mirror everything we do, consciously and unconsciously.

Conclusion

What can you do to promote world peace? Go home and love your family. – Mother Teresa

And when you make your love conditional by saying: “Eat this porridge. You’ll make mommy love you even more.” Or “Behave, little man, don’t upset your father, he doesn’t love the kids that act this way.” And unnoticeably that little heart is wounded with the realization that mommy will love him “only” and “if” he will be just like that boy who lives next door. The consequences of this conditional love are harsh. Someday your little darling won’t be so dependent on you and feeling the taste of freedom he will lose the connection with you, who loved “only” and “if” in search of real love, but not believing in its existence. And this lack of trust in the purity of compassion will follow him wherever he goes. Don’t make this happen. Don’t ruin the trust and loving power of the heart you were entrusted to bring into this world.

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