Rustling, quickly-moving, clear-voiced, V. was extravagant and a little disquieting. Large, square face and little grayish eyes – there was nothing soft or gracious about her. Up to everything and down on herself, V. was a splendid actress but didn’t quite believe in it herself. She formed the habit of sticking pins into her dignity. I always felt an impulse to pull out the pins.
Her conversation was of a sort that gave a large license to originality and wittiness. But she accused herself of not being like some other beautiful and successful actress, and that competition she was constantly in with others heated me so that it almost scorched.
Goodness only knew how far from the truth V.’s self-understanding was. She lived in a constant state of competition-stupidity with others and the only salvation I could see was to recharge her self-esteem, and to redirect her competitive spirit on herself.
The winter of 2017 was the toughest in V.’s life. She lost her father (her mom died two years prior) and being the only child, she was now left alone. I came to console and pull her out of that misery she thrashed herself into.
I kicked all the clothes off the bed and chairs, made V. get up and look in the mirror. I was not very picky with words when I held my hand to keep her silent and listen to the voice of reason. At the end of my tirade her smile was irradiation and the best reward I could ever ask for.
V. had a habit of talking to herself in a mocking and resentful key. And I made a goal to change it during the week we spent together in a Turkish all-inclusive hotel by the sea. This trip was a transformation therapy that I prescribed to my friend. My voice sounded in her ears with continuous expressions of love and beauty, serenity and benevolence, exquisiteness and originality of her personality.
I made my best to instill in V. envy to her better-future-self, substituting the raving desire to be somebody else. Only when she took herself and the choices she made in an axiomatic loving and respecting manner was she able to call her life her own. Starting from this turning point any defects became goals—a way to flawless crystal image of her future self.
It was worth the trouble of looking at and admiring my renewed friend. Her features started to express intense intelligence which brought her self-respect back to her eyes and self-love back to her heart. Now the atmosphere about her sent a cheerful warmth and a suggestion of comfort and ease.
V. was wrongly choosing idols from a famous Hollywood crowd, and that was a definite failure. When the wind of self-respect and self-love started to blow in her sails V. became a capital person to be around and to listen to. Now she was brave to be different, courageous to disagree, bold to self-express, and daring to call her-future-self the best person in the world.
She found the best acting teacher in a stand-up women’s comedy show. People praised her, and she rejoiced, friends criticized sometimes, and she was grateful. She started as an out-of-stage minor character and won her way to a leading actress participating in every show in her best disguise. Ingenious people loved her, and slightly shallow minds didn’t understand and avoided her—and that was just the price for being true.
Olya Aman 
I will try your tip to add “love” or “honey” to everything I say to myself! So very uplifting!
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This is another wonderful post and your site seems to be packed full. I love this for sure and am always in need of some uplifting as well as reminders and tips to help me do just that.
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I know for me I frequently struggle with the procrastination. It’s so easy to just put something off. But then it always comes back to bite you in some way.
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Thanks for sharing this wonderful and amazing content. we really need compete against ourselves by fighting against Procrastination, Negligence and Negative Behavior.
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I always try to challenge myself to do things that I never thought I could do. I think it is important to do this instead of always taking the easy route for everything.
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Procrastination is often my own worst enemy too! It’s soooo easy to say “I’ll do it tomorrow.” and you might even mean it at the time.
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Seriously amazing message! Thank you for this. I needed to read it.
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I am always competing against myself to see how I can BEAT my yesterday’s self!! It works like a charm and it motivates me to KEEP ON TRUCKING!
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This is amazing really, THANK YOU…For me, my biggest challenge is procrastination but I am confronting it.
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Your site is a great addition to the many I’ve been reading on a regular basis. Yours is a go to place for something inspiring.
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You are so right that we need to get rid of the negatives and bring out the positives in ourselves, in others, and in competition.
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This is such an inspiring post. Regardless our dedication, sometimes, we fail and we need great posts like yours to get back on track.
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I enjoyed reading this blog post so much! These are really great tips to fight with those inner enemies. Amazing and inspiring post
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There are some really great messages in this blog post. Like serious, I can pick a favorite because I love them all. I said “Amen!” to every single one them because they are so true.
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I get in moods. Sometimes I am super on top of things and other times I procrastinate
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I am so competitive with myself. I always want to do better than I have before. It can be great but sometimes I have to learn to be more gentle with myself.
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This is a very well written article and the message is inspiring. Thanks for sharing your impressive talent with us.
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I tend to procastinate quite a bit. This is definitely something I have to work on.
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I guess its true what they say, we have the power to be our own worst enemy,
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Thanks for such and wonderful post, I must agree we have fight with our inner demons to reform ourselves and also to keep abreast in this ever changing world.
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Procrastination is always the main enemy. It kills time and then talent.
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This is a very powerful post. I need to watch my behavior when it comes to procrastination.
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An inspiring post about how to overcome procrastination! Its something I need to work on!
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That’s an amazing and inspiring post. We should all try to be our very best self. Procrastination is my main enemy which I need to be careful of.
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This is such an inspiration for me to focus on what’s happening in my life and continue to improve what I have started and try to be a model for others.
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