Category Archives: Personal Growth

Personal Growth

Body Positivity Couldn’t Be Explained Better Than This

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Regardless of their size, every woman is an apotheosis of fashionable nobility

It was wholly unlike the ‘Permitted Style’, and she could see the people’s awe and distant wonder… – Olya Aman

Sasha is my best friend. We had, and still have, a tradition in our village school to welcome 1st graders with smiles and handshakes from 5th graders. Sasha was the one to take my hand and lead me to my class. From then on, we were seeing each other regularly in school and outside of it.

Being charming ladies in our 30s, now we have families and both live very far from our native place. Some favorable universal coincidence glued us to the same town, though, so we still keep in touch.

Regardless of Their Size, Every Woman Is an Apotheosis of Fashionable Nobility and Strives to Be in Style

The fashion industry should find a sympathetic response in our lives - treat everyone with dignity and respect. It must not suppress self-expression and creativity.

Sasha has a large, square face, with a massive projecting nose and long-lashed, pale blue eyes. When she is smiling to herself, her face shines pink and childish. She is like one of those extinct birds, the Alagoas foliage-gleaner, once found in northeast Brazil, because she wears that elaborate hairstyle of a curiously improbable shade of orange.

Sasha is undeniably slender, and ponderably light, and… proveably short. Even in school, when people wished to distinguish her from the others, they always called her the ‘miniature one’. Nothing changed these days in this respect.

Sasha used to dress as if she had no sense of proportion, and the colors were always pyrotechnical. That was not her fault. You see, she had a sneaking mania for a fashionable style, particularly when she saw a slender, tall body wearing it. But her reality was the indispensable crisis — she couldn’t find the same garments to fit her petite form. And Sasha felt empty-hearted heading to the kids’ section all over again.

Social Media Is a Majestic Influencer and You Can Manifest the True Body Image Through It

Social media kick starts trends in fashion, particularly when used to illustrate diversity and body-accepting concepts. Nowadays everything is ridiculously exhilarated, beautifully abnormal, and deliciously insane. Gradually our vision is gaining in focus, and we wear confident faces and elegant outfits.

One-day I found Sasha turning everything in her wardrobe topsy-turvy and inside out. The whole place was utterly destroyed, as if by an earthquake, but it was only her frustration burning. With half-shut eyes she was lying on the floor in the middle of that devastation in a perfect unrelaxation.

That day Sasha decided to make a try for Paradise. She decided to be happy, even if it would cost her all honesty and money. Sasha shouldered her way in social media. She crafted her own outfits, which added a rousing fashionable kick to the lives of women with romantically shaped but very tiny forms. She created her own line of “Fashion for Petite” driving change and building her own following.

Clothes Have About Them Something Irretrievably Thought-Provoking for People Around

Our thoughts take on the color of our clothing. One can look simple and charming, and that will strengthen the desire to connect with other people. And being very much aware that you look stunning can bring closer the desire to bestow a little attention to a beloved person.

Sasha regained her good spirits. She is in sympathy with her beautiful self now when she makes her own clothes. She adopted and promoted smart and elegant dressing habit. Her style sends messages to her mind and the minds of others about self-respect and body positivity.

Sasha feels that the conventional visual landscape of the beautiful person needs to be changed. I think she joined a contagious, great, and brilliant movement that broadens the very narrow rules existent for what is considered ‘beautiful’

Conclusion

Being petite myself, I used to be almost swept away by the continually unsuccessful shopping experience. We all desire to parade among our acquaintances in the outfits tailored handsomely and becoming. But we used to be constantly pained by the sight of the fashionable dresses and blouses with shoulders too wide and waists too low.

That wretched mental stupor, the fashion industry used to be in, finally seemed to lighten. Inclusive sizing becomes a good business strategy, even for many haute couture houses. Women of different shapes want to be true to the trend and be part of a modern fashionable movement.

Inclusive sizing is more than just the first subtle outcropping in the fashion industry, it is a re-creating mountain that is going to influence many things in the world. 00, petite, and plus-sizes should not be treated as problems to be solved, but as realities respected and rightfully enlisted in life and business.

Stay tuned…

Personal Growth

The Power of Tenderness and Compassion in My Relationship

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Secrets about water that my life put to the proof

The voice of natural water sounds silver and life… – Olya Aman

Water can rise through the trunks of gigantic trees against tens of atmospheres of pressure. What is more surprising, though, is the faculty of a human being to rise over hatred and aggression in the world, indifference and treachery towards himself, and still be loving and empathetic.

“What the dickens do you drink this water for?” I said deprecatingly, when my dog fired ahead to the water that was spilled on the floor. The bottle it came from was a gift that I didn’t appreciate enough. I considered it a wired birthday present. My dog was a much better expert in a healthy way of life, eating only food in green packages with the logo “organic” on it. And he never before ate anything from the floor, preferring his silvery plate to any other vessel.

I felt that I had to learn more about THIS water. And I discovered that I, being an educated twenty-two-year-old lady at the time, knew nothing AT ALL about this substance. Magnetism and energy locked in this bottle transformed my life.

The honored man that presented the fortunate flask became a source of happiness for me. His kind soul wrapped in a beautiful body opened a new world of love and shared happiness. I went from enchantment to enchantment, scenting compassion in the air, and this feeling of admiration gave a new turn to my thoughts.

The imminent danger of water’s memory.

Experiments in many countries around the world have shown that water remembers everything that occurs in the space that surrounds it. The water structure of each person’s body is identical to the water structure of the place where he was born. Our internal connection to our homeland is depicted in the water of that place. And our inner water-based computer records the entire history of our relationship with the world around us.T

Marat is my future husband, and his story is a vivid example of a ‘movie-like’ experience that is unforgettable and needed to be shared with others.

He seemed to have everything but for the memory of his early childhood and youth. That was strange. Marat possessed the knowledge and education to be adequate and navigate his way in the world, but he could not remember the words said by his mother, and the school games went to with his father.

That happened after the car crash that left him, a single child of a happy middle-aged couple, an orphan. Doctors said it was a post-stress reaction of his brain. The neatly structured organ in his head tried to protect him against his own will. Marat longed to remember, but not any conventional or alternative medicine could help him do so.

One day, about 11 years ago, his best friend came back after a long journey to far-away countries. He brought exclamations of praise and deep respect for the elderly healer he met there. Marat didn’t believe it could work and agreed to go only for the sake of adventure.

The ceremony of their encounter reminded a scene from a mystery movie. Marat and a small wrinkly guy in a dress-like white shirt were staring at one another blankly without words. Then the old man showed Marat to his chamber. The cave was dark and cold and full of small and big glass jars with water. He filled Marat’s little cup from almost every container. And at the point of over dense tension in the easy to guess area in his belly, something extraordinary happened. Marat suddenly remembered. Springwater from a distant mountain village in Kyrgyzstan brought relief to his tired from searching brain.

It happened so that his father was born in that village. His parents, being almost desperate to conceive, went there and spent almost a year in that remote place. They came back to the States to give birth to their beloved son and get the benefit of traditional high-quality medical care. The water from that village remembered Marat, or, rather, his body remembered that water. Some impulse, the life force coming from this water, triggered the processes in his brain. It made the memory of his past a charming reality that he could take into his present.

No wonder, when Marat fell in love with me, from the first sight, by the way, he presented me with the most cherished gift he could imagine. Yes, he gave me a bottle of that pure spring water from far away Kyrgyzstan.

Human power both whitens and darkens water and souls.

Nowadays it became clear that positive and negative human emotions are the strongest elements of influence on water. Water, experiencing fear, aggression, hatred, projected on it, is suffering. Those feelings deform its structure and reduce its energy. Love, on the contrary, increases water’s energy. The power of tenderness and compassion is yet unexplained, but accepted by almost everyone’s intellect.

I became the most negligent person when it came to the choice of food after I broke up with my ex. He took excellent care of his diet and very little of my emotional state. I was devastatingly unhappy in our relationship. He was a handsome, cold-hearted person, which made me detest anything good-looking, tasty, and healthy. I developed a belief that things, being eatable or not, are pretty on the outside and empty on the inside.

After our separation, I was rebelling my past healthy lifestyle, and I became a regular visitor to fast-food places. That made me look 10 years older and 30 pounds heavier. I thought badly about the food I ate and drinks I consumed but continued to do so to prove some wired point, the meaning of which I couldn’t explain even to myself. All those substances I swallowed made me feel even more depressed until the day I met my future husband, Marat.

He is incredibly plump and extremely cheerful. His spirit is contented and grateful. Nothing can spoil his positive attitude to life, even my negative connotation of every aspect of it.

First few months we ate at the same bad-quality-food places I favored. Surprisingly, I felt my body not as heavy and my mood not as gloomy anymore. Somehow, Marat’s uplifting spirit charged every eatable object with his life-giving energy.

When we started to live together and Marat became a master of the kitchen space, life became almost an unbearably sweet experience. Both of us fell in love with new aspects of vigorous and healthy life. By degrees, we started to spend quite ridiculous money on food, and water was the number one investment in our list of the most important things.

Water combats behavior and life itself with music and love.

Classical music gives water an occasion for displaying the splendor of symmetric beauty. As if choosing music that uplifts and rejuvenates us, we should be spellbound listening to a loving person, and determined to run away from a twisted and vengeful one.

I love music, and I am a skilled pianist. I and my husband attend musical events as often as we can. My best friend, but for my husband, is a magnificent instrument in our living room.

Every day I hurry home to my soulmate and discuss Mozart, Bach, and Beethoven with it. The decanter full of water is on the nearby table and it witnesses all my musical performances. I have a habit of taking it to our dinner table and later to our bedroom. This water seems to be full of notes of love and care, beauty, and affection. I take excellent care of my water and fill the vessel with the best of the best. Play music to it and make every note enter my body and my soul. I drink it with satisfaction and feel refreshed, delighted, invigorated. I am forgetting my cares, feeling as if I had wings to my feet.

No thing about water is an illusion. Nothing in the world is softer and more yielding than water. We do not realize how close and almost identical we are. Water wears down the hard and strong, and none can overcome it. When our strength husbanded, we are capable of glorious things just the like.

Stay tuned…

Personal Growth

10 Things That Can Ruin Your Social Media Presence

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If you are exposed to attention of millions – they are exposed to your influence. – Olya Aman

Introduction

His ability to write and voice what he thought was as well-kept as his perfect mustache. He was a true modern incarnation of my beloved Poirot and had the same initials. By the butterfly’s wing of his white necktie, P. could charm any woman and make every man jealous of his looks and manner.

I stopped talking and, putting on an observant air, pricked my ears in evident delight. The lecture began with an opening statement on our honored guest’s background: a short summary of his accomplishments and a brief enumeration of his published works.

P. lived for years in depressive intoxication: he was dismissed from work, lost his house, his wife left him, and he ended up living in the streets for three consecutive years after that. With superhuman effort he evoked himself from this slumber: found a job, a room to live, a phone to call old friends and family. P. carried the burden of his misery and cruel memories wisely. He portrayed his journey of recovery in his social media accounts and speeches that he gave throughout the country.

The support P. received gave him courage enough to write his first book: “FROM A BEGGAR TO AN INFLUENCER.” He skillfully depicted the sincerity of his renewed self-belief, -worth, and -respect.

P. pronounced the word of truth, the word of gratification and excuse in his most honored books. He had sadness and shadow in his life and managed to transform it into joy and light and, which is fascinating, to inspire others to do the same.

I turned on the recording function on my phone, entrusting to it to capture not only meaning but also the vibration of P.’s charismatic baritone and the elevating vibe of his emotions.

1) An Invocation to the Sacred Collective Intelligence

“A few years ago, I was a little worse than nobody and only the wealth of feeling and imagination kept me going. I did my best to put as many external-change-miles between myself and that past self that resembled a lizard person: fat, distressed, and overall unhappy street beggar.”

“When the visible transformation that I depicted in my social media accounts afforded a strong confirmatory evidence of my will power I noticed a considerable follower increase that continued to be so till the dark day in July of 2017.”

Social media is like an invocation to the sacred collective intelligence of the audience. The effort you are making to draw attention, to Go Viral, Create Memes (a discovery that is shared so widely that it becomes a part of internet culture) becomes a luminous point in the coming days of your life.

The magic in social media comes with excited, placid, deep, and limpid emotions shared, spread across social media realms. It is a superhuman vision that media evokes. It is heightened by valued people, trendsetters and their ability to network. They spread messages and those are never in repose after that but forever in flight and their course is insatiable.

The success in this internet universe is determined by the ability to penetrate the silence of the eyes, the voices in the heads, and the vibrations in the hearts of humanity in your niche. If you are able to see into the inside of your people: the misery they suffer, the happiness they crave, the thoughts that grow out of their experiences, the infinite emotions that lay hidden in their hearts – then the glory of having created the solution, redeeming the suffering, showing the new world of ideas and distractions will put you in a sort of ecstasy.

The feeling of affectionate attention that social media can give is the opium of modern world that can either stop the tempest of doubt and dread, of jealousy and rage that people feel or increase the intensity of those harmful feelings to the unbearable degree.

2) An Electric Current that Goes Through the Hearts and Minds of People

“The flow of traffic accompanied by the feeling of power and monetary satisfaction was an engine that propelled my activity and at the same time throttled my ability to reflect and empathize. People started to ask my expert opinion and I was delighted at the opportunity to dominate, preach and teach.”

“Those in distress found it motivating and uplifting to follow my story. I managed to create a balance and unity of thoughts and feelings through my speeches on the stage and in my videos. I painstakingly pieced my life in a few hours and elated people by my example.”

“A few followers sent me pleading for help letters. They needed more attention and encouragement. I became too arrogantly busy to spend enough time to do so. By a remarkable coincidence, those few incidents of my negligence skipped calling publicity (no one complained). So, the ruin of my social media career was not due to my silence but on the contrary – thanks to the too-loud-opinions that I’d expressed.”

Social media is an electric current that goes through the hearts and minds of people. The perfect sculpture of this system of sharing contains words, ideas, pictures, videos, and audios.

Face to face, emotion to emotion, wound to wound – this world has a childish soul and a limited mind behind the vastness of information. Without wise guidance life within it is saddened and future is black. Making first steps in social media world, make sure you have a mentor to help you navigate your way. It will save you a lot of time and energy.

Sheltered from harmful influence, protected for a time against the fearful spells of over dense information one can mature and add great knowledge and exclusiveness to his life with the help of social media. Now you can find what you need in seconds without spending hours in the library turning pages after pages. The resources available are numerous and categorized for you by reviews of many people.

It is a fine modern privilege to be able to skillfully direct the route in social media realms. And without knowing how to do it any life in there is short-lived and weak.

3) A Fearful Spell of Judgments

“The social air grew colder as my vanity expressed itself louder. And when the mist of my unfavorable twitts rolled along the world like a dense cloud of smoke, the decline of my reputation was not possible to stop.”

“I was busily engaged in judging and criticizing the ways of life that considerably differed from the one I was living at the moment. I forgot that only a few years prior I was a complete contradictory person to what I represented at the time. With much ceremony and stateliness, I voiced verdicts like: ‘I do not understand how one can live like that’, ‘I cannot respect a person acting in this way’, ‘how one can live in such a body’… and many more of a similar kind.”

“Finally, the tragedy was entered into my life with the full force and distractive power. The strength of public protest crashed the respect that I earned in the eyes of the outer world and my own self-worth suffered immensely. For the second time in my life, I was ruined mentally, morally, and physically. And if the first time circumstances and out-of-my-control factors were to blame, this time I was the only one responsible.”

Successful people, influencers, use admirable art of words and gestures, contagious images and piquant, unique ideas, ingenious salutations – and all of it to invest in their future. The more engaging content they put out to the world of social media the more they get back in terms of attention and affiliate advertising opportunities.

4) A Positive Distraction or a Depressing Factor

“I seated myself opposite the people I was trying to help. My first intention was forgotten in the confusion of attention and praise that I was luxuriously thrusting myself into. Anger and annoyance at what I expressed publicly was a just confirmation of my moral decline.”

“I used to be close to these people when I was one of them: working hard, feeling tired and depressed sometimes but with an effort lifting my head and doing what was right. I was able to break the chain of negative behavior, emotions, and feelings. I prided myself with this accomplishment. People were empowered by my example and generosity of my statements.”

At the same time, there are a lot of damaging oddities that may attract the audience and create a collective desire for negative behavior. That mostly touches kids and teenagers, but some insecure grown-up people are a target as well. To prevent it, parents need to create their own system of censorship. Guidance when making the first steps in learning how to use the world of information is required in school with books and in life with internet.

A life we live every day is diverse and enveloped in good and bad, jolly and sad, interesting and boring. Often the latter prevails, but what we see online is not the reality we usually live offline. The idealized picture may serve as a distraction that betters our life or as a depressing factor. And the feedback our emotions receive depends on the self-esteem we feel. Fear and lack of self-worth create pessimistic interaction between our life and the lives that other people expose to our attention online.

5) Unlimited and Unrestrained Debates

“When I forgot my past self, I took the transformation that I’d managed to make as purely my own doing. I easily threw away the encouragement that I’d received on the way to my new body and mind, forgetting the impact my followers made. They rightly broke off the ties and left not only reproachful comments but, what is more painful, a memory of love turned into hate, respect transformed into contempt, and admiration altered by disgust.”

Debates online are fueled by unlimited attention and participation. People engage in discussions and say a lot to the purpose and absolutely out of it, which makes it unrestrained. Some people act under a firm conviction that their opinion is always right. Criticism is uncontrolled and any tenderness to the feelings is often nonexistent. If you decide to share part of your life online, consider that and be warned and armed to address it in the right way.

6) A Way to Maintain a Stronger Connection

“To build connection is a tenacious and time-consuming work. To maintain it is just as hard. But to ruin everything you do not need to make any effort at all. One publicly shared unfavorable statement of yours can crash years of tough movement to the desired.”

“I felt support and love gushing from the hearts of people that liked what I was doing. I felt the lack of it the more painful for it. Who has lived in the light of attention cannot feel contented in the uncrowded space of lonely life without it.”

“I hastened to repair my life by self-reflecting and writing all my feelings and thoughts down. When I published my second book “BUILD CONNECTION WITH RESPECT IN SOCIAL MEDIA WORLD” I didn’t anticipate the impact that this work would do.”

“One of the main things that defer humankind from any other creature on this Earth is the ability to forgive. My book helped me to be forgiven because I was sincerely sorry for what I’ve said and the way I acted.”

With social media it is easier to be loved and courted by distant relations. But if you say and show too much, you may appear somewhat self-opinionated – people do not like it. If one touches upon the lives of others over any limit, it shows that he or she is a narrow-minded, tattling old gossip – people hate it.

The greatest installment to the debt of sincere affection is truth and genuineness. When you share your happiness, you connect with other people on a level of positive vibes, and by doing this, you multiply the bliss in your life.

The impact you have on your social network should serve to solace spirits and soothe tempers. If your company is pleasing and online conversation is genuine people come back to your platform and bring friends along.

Becoming a soul of authentic order online is very important for keeping a true and strong connection with people. Fresh news or old scandal, trivial questions or oft-repeated observations – when online it is spread across the minds with the speed that beats the light one. Be careful of what you share and remember that when you are radiant with dignity and depth of soul your charm is keenly spiritual and has an ineffable power to attract and subjugate the hearts.

7) An Advertising Dreamland

“Covering my face with my hands I sank into a new life of renewed self-awareness. I was suffused with a crimson flush. It was not from the shame but from the pleasant feeling of regained self-esteem. This mistake taught me my duty and served as an advertisement for my work. The sad remembrance of my failure helped me to be more sincere and open to the people who addressed me online and off-line.”

“This experience of sinking lower and lower cast over my writing those brilliant hints and expressions that touched the hearts of people. MY heart was set on a right track to impress and uplift, to inspire and motivate.”

Slowly, using content marketing or more quickly through influencer marketing one can achieve results with persistent and constant effort. To set up an advertising campaign nowadays you do not need to hire a whole bunch of experts. One smart person can be enough, or you can do it even by yourself.

When people grow fond of your content, you realize with some unaccountable satisfaction that they will buy what you have to offer. It does not free you of responsibility to maintain your reputation valued by always offering quality products. If your blog is loved, make your book shine with more excessive excellence of information. If you look so lovely that people cannot help admiring your charming outfits, make sure the clothing and accessories you recommend worth the price people are ready to pay for them.

8) A Limited Personality Perception

“The third book I published “THINGS YOU DO NOT KNOW” was about friends and kindred, close and distant connections, valuable and reserved network, people of the world and out of it – and how to use the things you do not know to build relationships.”

“The ‘secret’ I shared was a universal axiom, known to everybody and neglected by many – to live by ‘not-judging’ because of ‘not-knowing’. It became a sensation overnight. The quotes from it were flying through the media with the speed of light: “If you do not understand that I am a man like every other man, you take me for what you are afraid in yourself… You do not need to know me if you are not going to judge me… If you intend to rank me in your system of values, take pains to perceive me thoroughly…”

“And let me tell you that to get to ‘perceive thoroughly’ anybody is a rare skill not everybody has. We seldom know ‘good enough’ ourselves to claim to be experts in forming opinions about other people.”

In the internet society we often miss the expression of the face and the attitude of the body – an essential part of the information needed for making a clear picture of any person. Our perception is a tenuous membrane that is too rudely buffeted by the stressors from outside and emotions from inside. Everything happens too quickly, and we learn to run with time and information. Often, we mechanically put labels on things around us: ‘useful’ and ‘unimportant’, ‘true’ and ‘false’, ‘positive’ and ‘negative’. This mode of action helps us to keep our minds sane in the whirling world we live in. But no one can be justly proud of using the same method with people.

Personality is not an easy book to read overnight and write a short review in two hours in the morrow. Every person is a universe in itself, complicated, with undiscovered phenomena on every corner. Family, close relations, distant connections, society, things around, climate outside, and numerous other factors play their role in personality formation. Without a thorough knowledge of all these criteria how one can justly say ‘I know you’ or ‘if I were you I would do this or that’?

How can you solve a mathematical problem with limited information given? The answer won’t be right. And to my mind, it is better to restrain from being in the obvious wrong by judging too rashly. When it comes to people and relationships one needs to pause and contemplate before acting in any way.

When it comes to social media behavior I would say: express yourself as freely as you feel comfortable doing and detain your conclusions about other people as long as you can. The world is small when it comes to emotions. To cause pain is as easy these days as to type one or two sentences in your ‘compose new Tweet’ box.

9) A Dangerous Ground for Conflict

“In my fourth book “WHEN MY GRANDIOUR SLIPPED AWAY” I was eager and ashamed to tell the story of my failure in light of my obtained vastness of understanding myself. I slightly kicked upon the prostrated form of my past-self with responsibility in my mind and empathy in my heart.”

“People trusted me, asked questions and conferred their fears and mistakes on me. And due to my arrogance, I failed to respect their confessions. I was down on my luck, but I continued at all costs to regain respect I lost by taking responsibility for the words and behavior I expressed when self-esteem deserted me.”

If at some point any influencer adopts a manner to look down on other people, they will despise this person in return. Social media has a smell of the sensational air and it may knock some people down by way of spreading negativity. We wish it to be territorial and stay where it was born, but the reality proves it to be much speedier than any positive, harmless piece of news.

A certain instinct, not a virtuous one, makes people talk about bad things times more than about good ones. But no one stops you to have a system and an orbit of your own thinking and acting. Spreading positive, non-judgmental content is a noble life-improving mission. And I wish we had as many people following this creed as possible.

10) A Positive Channel of Valuable Information

“The direction of positive influence was swiftly borne through the damp and gloomy atmosphere of failure. We are composed of little foibles and weaknesses of our kind. And to take control over them is our obligation.”

“My experiences strengthened my ability to reflect. Now there are no troubles that can efface love and respect that I feel, vigor and positivity that I share.”

Make an effort to follow the motto of spreading love in a way that the knees of people who receive it knock in delight. Let your life take a flight and prove to the world that the indestructible leading mind can enjoy the pleasure of creating peace and abundance of beauty.

Try to be incapable of stupidity and hurtful blunders. Self-express in the most comfortable, profitable, and amenable way. The infinite good nature lives in everyone and is always of to-day.

Conclusion

To never loose actuality online is to listen to the feedback of your followers. Negative feedback requires a good deal of wisdom and patience to be responded in the right way. Do not be too involved when addressing it. When you look at the things in a detached way you see the picture more clearly and form an understanding in a much better way.

People who can fail and redeem themselves in the eyes of others, who accused them – these people have a note of rarity. Well-intentionally disguising offense means to be able to wait wisely and act rightly. Steadiness is needed to keep the temper in peace when people refuse to accept your train of thoughts. Sometimes the best way out of it is to offer some budgets of fresh news to divert the attention. Let the things cool down and then ask forgiveness if you happen to offend someone.

Remember – a spirit of candor and frankness never fails. Peoples’ hearts are sensitive plants, they open for a moment to sincere attention but curl up and shrink into themselves at the slightest touch of false feeling or rude injurious intention.

Stay tuned…

Personal Growth

3 Reasons to Compete Against Yourself

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Self-Competition Is a Gambit in a Self-Development Game

Introduction

Rustling, quickly-moving, clear-voiced, V. was extravagant and a little disquieting. Large, square face and little grayish eyes – there was nothing soft or gracious about her. Up to everything and down on herself, V. was a splendid actress but didn’t quite believe in it herself. She formed the habit of sticking pins into her dignity and this venerable instrument of her nature was suffering immensely. I always felt an impulse to pull out the pins, they did inflict so much damage on V’s vulnerable personality, and I believed she could make a better use of her sharpness.

Her conversation was of a sort that gave a large license to originality and wittiness. But she accused herself of not being like some other beautiful and successful actress (who AGAIN got a part in a movie she was auditioned for) – and that competition she was constantly in with others heated me so that it almost scorched.

Some Interior (self) and Exterior (with others) Competition is like a bad and a good joke – one is amusing to everybody you care about and whose opinion matters to you, and the other is funny only to outsiders, people of the world in which you have no place of your own. An infinity of malicious amusement lurks in those who compare themselves to others instead of finding enough will to meet the metrics and values that suit them. Because to win in Exterior Competition is possible but the reward, whatever it is, won’t do one any good.

Imagine fighting in a war for a foreign government – you end up on a winning side, the country is rejoicing, dividing treasures, lands, and you … you go home with empty hands in ill-fitted uniform and no one cares about your heroic deeds in your homeland. And why would they? You didn’t fight for theirs (you got it – YOURS) freedom.

The noble war against your rivals (negative behavior, harmful habits, pessimistic thinking, procrastination, etc.) is never ending and always self-satisfactory. You win one battle and right away plan another strategic military attack on your own chosen enemies, transforming them into your comrades on a way to a better-future-you. Every victory is adding more confidence and vitality, indolent grace and ease, charm and charisma, and with every year you look far more experienced and at the same time far more youthfully alive.

Turn on the Niagara of the Infinite Change. Determine ‘What’ to Confront.

Goodness only knew how far from the truth V.’s self-understanding was. She looked down at the world through sharply evaluating everything eyes. She was somehow always out of spirits and her life was punctuated by little and big disappointments. She lived in a constant state of competition-stupidity with others and the only salvation I could see was to recharge her self-esteem, and to redirect her competitive spirit on herself.

We live and learn, experience pain and pleasure, establish relationships and break up bridges – we change. Having made this pronouncement I want to emphasize that the modification ‘to the better’ or ‘to the worse’ lies entirely with us. Like a ship you can choose to move along a sleek and oily swell that leads nowhere or a bumpy troubled sea that will get you to a wonderful shore with a marvelous view.

The process is most likely arduous and exhilarating but the result is always pyrotechnical – and when one colorful transformation takes place you cannot help waiting, open-eyed and alert, for the next one. Change to the better-future-you is fascinating, and it demands to be continued once started.

1) Procrastination

The winter of 2017 was the toughest in V.’s life. She lost her father (her mom died two years prior) and being the only child, she was now left alone. My voice was hoarse and weary with preaching the weekend I spent with her. I came to console and pull her out of that misery she thrashed herself into, willingly and almost gladly, taking that as an excuse to her apathy and lack of desire to fight her way in life.

The battle with procrastination is simply a development of magic. You stop the baa-baa business of excuses and make an action. Deeds not words are the man’s first and most grandiose invention. With directed activity, you can create a whole new universe of your own. Charge yourself with envy to a Tomorrow-You, endow yourself with passions and faculties of your inner stronger personality that was waiting for the privilege to come up front and pronounce the sentence of power and will. A lizard person should rapidly shoot up into a lion person – that power resides in every one of us.

2) Negligence

I kicked all the clothes off the bed and chairs, made V. get up and look in the mirror. Her ears didn’t play her false – I was not very picky with words when like a policeman arresting the flow of traffic I held my hand to keep her silent and listen to the voice of reason. She popped back in self-care immeasurably during the weeks spent in her deserted family dwelling. And she had clapped the door shut behind self-love and respect long before that happened. Being almost oracular in painting symbolical pictures of TRUE success through TRUE completion I made the atmosphere palpitate, and at the end of my tirade her smile was irradiation and the best reward I could ever ask for.

3) Negative Behavior

V. had a habit of talking to herself in a mocking and resentful key. And I made a goal to change it during the week we spent together in a Turkish all-inclusive hotel by the sea. This trip, that I almost forced her to agree to accompany me to, was a transformation therapy that I prescribed to my friend. My voice sounded and sounded in her ears with the insistence of mechanical noise when I went on and on in continuous expressions of love and beauty, serenity and benevolence, exquisiteness and originality of her personality.

‘How’ to Be Busily Engaged in Self-Competition and Enjoy It

I made my best to instill in V. envy to her better-future-self, substituting the raving and displeasing desire to be somebody else. Only when she took herself and the choices she made in an axiomatic loving and respecting manner was she able to call her life her own. And starting from this turning point any defects, that she had in her own eyes, became goals – a way to flawless crystal image of her future self.

1) Be Guided by Self-Love

It was worth the trouble of looking at and admiring my renewed friend. When V. stopped her bleating, bellowing, and neighing her features started to express intense intelligence which brought her self-respect back to her eyes and self-love back to her heart. Now the atmosphere about her sent a cheerful warmth and a suggestion of comfort and ease. Her loving heart spoke to her and to others. Every intercourse was amiable because positive expectation was in the air.

2) Be Led by a True Idol

V. was wrongly choosing idols from a famous Hollywood crowd, and that was a definite failure and a pointless race that painfully oppressed her heart. This false competition like an ill-made overcoat made her look ill-fitted to life. People liked her description by others better than they liked her because no one could hear her own conversation, those were only words expected, gestures already made by someone else, and expressions approved by the mirror.

When the wind of self-respect and self-love started to blow in her sails V. became a capital person to be around and to listen to. Every human being has his shell, and her shell was her vocabulary and the whole envelope of her sharp mind. Now she was brave to be different, courageous to disagree, bold to self-express, and daring to call her-future-self the best person in the world.

Do not write your life in a variety of strange hands rather than using your own. You do this when you get into external competition. It squeezes you into insignificance when you try to be someone else instead of finding your own way, style, amplua. The only hero you should be obsessed with is ‘you-tomorrow’. There is an inspiration in this strive, you grasp at pleasure and fail to get a complete hold of it as it always gets bigger and a little farther from your reach. It remains possible and impossible at the same time. And this game is never ending which makes life a fascinating experience.

3) Be Directed by Positive Criticism and Hones Praise

V. was able to unite the intrinsic (love to herself) and extrinsic (praise and criticism) advantages and became an extraordinary personality, the one that you can drink like a healthy cocktail and never have enough of the precious taste and benefits. She found the best acting teacher in a stand-up women’s comedy show. People praised her, and she rejoiced, friends criticized sometimes, and she was grateful. She started as an out-of-stage minor character and won her way to a leading actress participating in every show in her best disguise – never rudely present, always profitably clever and wisely funny. Everything she did or said was up to the most intelligent unoffensively critical and humorous way. Ingenious people loved her, and slightly shallow minds didn’t understand and avoided her – and that was just the price for being true – likable and not so much, lovable and not so much, respected and always so.

Conclusion

Woe to those who dream of what others have and fail to see the potential in themselves. Competition with others runs you into a blind alley. It takes the truth and love to present to you an internal competition anew. To be guided by things meaningful for you is like an invocation to a sacred beauty that awaits you on this way. The world is made small if you busy yourself with the faults of other people. When you overcome your fears and strive to be better than you were yesterday – the world enlarges by your presence. Living in this state you are never in repose but forever in flight. You arrest yourself for a moment when you reach one goal and continue an endless way to a better-you. Every move you make is a smile not a sigh. The vision of ‘you-tomorrow’ should be intoxicating and reviving.

Stay tuned…

Personal Growth

Why Social Media Overtakes the World

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“I want to have memories that are realities and are better than anything that can ever happen to anyone”, said P. in a husky, breathy voice, and stole cautiously towards the house.

Introduction

P. always had a real aesthetic passion for antiquity. He bought a house, magnificent and terribly incommodious. It was offered at a great bargain. He was working tooth and nail to pay the bills. Now this property was out of danger. But there was time when he almost lost it… and himself.

P. was tall, lean, loosely and feebly put together. His face was ugly, sickly grayish color. But it was a charming face – he looked clever and ill. His blazing eyes were beautiful. In his three-and-seventy he stepped in his life with the eager nimbleness of a boy. The time when he was seven-and-fifty, ruined in spirit, body, and monies had been far away but not forgotten.

1) Early Days and Struggles

His success was not rapid and had much of the inoffensiveness of failure. He was kind when he needed to be cruel, generous when life asked for frugality, emotional and quick-tempered when patience and reserve were at stake.

The house was too much for him in many ways. Too expensive, too big, too ugly, too isolated, too everything. It had an Elizabethan flavor about it and served as another nail in the ancient coffin of his financial troubles. Still, it became his salvation, ruining him and reviving anew. It was the sunshine of his life and he protected it with volcanic energy. 

You need the push and self-assertiveness to get ahead in professional life.

When a great natural aptitude for your business is in you, you are never as happy as when you do what you’ve been created for. Often, one needs many years and struggles to find the very thing one likes. In the course of working life, one parts with many illusions. The stories of success help the faculty of being interested in life from becoming worn out. There are many wonderful people, true people, and getting to know them virtually or personally is like going to a revival meeting and being converted to a success creed.

2) Close to Devastation

P.’s nature was the one that improved under strain that would kill a weaker person. He realized his mistake in buying this place but in ex post facto manner. He got into a financial pit and lost everything. He didn’t feel weepy, drying up the springs of regret in his heart. All faculties of his mighty brain were thrown into a struggle to find a way to get his dear home back. He could not see himself full and contented without it. One can pity such devotion towards a soulless thing, but he had a heart big enough to hold the love for the building, and the bodies occupying it and sharing his devotion. His wife seldom lost sight of the fact of him being so passionate about it. She interrupted his life with friendship and observed it with love, so he never had lack of affectionate emotion coming from a dear soul.

They stayed in the house waiting for the order to desert it. He couldn’t even think about the need to part with his dear soulless friend. His brain was all in a whirl, looking for the quick way to set them all at ease. Prior to that time, P. worked days and nights to keep it warm and cozy for his family. He had no chance to enjoy the luxury of staying in it long enough to warm his heart. The truck business he owned was calling his attention. When the first heavy snowfall left him in debt, three of his trucks broken and the forth offered as means to pay for the loss – he had no job and no money to spare even on food.

Never let yourself being invaded by a failure.

It, when coming to your life, should push you even harder to the goal you have. You become wiser with every misfortune, it enlarges your horizon. Every succeeding act of your life play is going to be better, more joyous, and less sad. Look for the stock of professional stories that are available online. People talk with vividness about their achievements, showing the way to success and giving a favorable interpretation to everything. And we all need a positive view on things, an optimistic expectation from life. This kind of energy is healthy for your mind, soul, and body.

3) Glimmer of a Solution

The idea presented itself when P. started to wander through his social media accounts. Now he had more time to look at his friends’ pages, admiring happy families of ones, and successful lives of travel and adventure of others. He was not discouraged by the displayed accomplishments of his former classmates, neighbors, and distant and close relations. P. was rather motivated to find a way to improve his life so that he can claim his house a soul property with no dread to lose it and enjoy his stay in it when and as long as he wanted.

He was searching through the success stories of other people, Facebook, YouTube, and Instagram influencers. People who were drafting the rules to live by, and enjoyed what they did, earning their living, commanding their time, and mastering their futures. He thought himself almost past everything but the former business he knew. Was it late to learn a different route in life? P. was taken up with the idea to add an internet turn to his life and regain freedom.

Always put new steps and slides to your idea.

If one way of reaching it is not working, do not change the idea, change the way to it. Add spring and variety to your imagination. Go against some obstacles and around them, outran them with your feeling and faith in a favorable outcome. You should always look back at the people who are able to introduce you to the world of ideas and propel your mental awakening. The atmosphere of endeavor, of expectancy and bright hopefulness should prevail in your life. This blissful vibe attracts positive events in life.

4) A Breakthrough Idea

P.’s excitable temperament rebounded from one extreme to the other. His belief in the sacred character of his social media enterprise made him almost tremble with passionate rage. And an idea gained in force by the energy with which it was expressed. His countrified old house served as his Muse. He filmed his life story and the history of the place, both of them worn like coins that had been long out of use. He kept the video at a high temperature, the success of it owed much to the mysterious melancholy of the place, where things had happened – many people died there, and that made it full of life.

Viral it became, being perfect frost for about two months and after that, suddenly, hundreds, thousands, and millions of views across all social media platforms. People spread the content, shared it with their friends and family. P.’s heart spoke to the hearts of other people. He made his life a poem, cuffed and buffeted through the world it became a hymn of struggle and devotion.

It may take time and many trials to get to the point you want. Never despair. Break into a run if needs be or slow down with it if time is not right. But never lose a strong hold of it. Do not try to live like the mice in the kitchen, making no noise, leaving no traces – be loud if it helps, be bright and big, and make people notice you. Do not be consumed by life, rather, dominate it and set your own nutrition standards.

5) Relief and Freedom

P. lost many things that others kept at his age, but his inner glow didn’t fade. He hadn’t lost the fire of life. His skin was hardened by hard work, old lazy eyes kept the images from the past, and all the strong things of his heart came out in his body, that was so tireless in serving generous emotions.

Freedom added vigor to P.’s personality. The list of his followers was huge, he shared every memorable event in the course of his crowded years and those videos had a deep color of emotion, that didn’t leave a nerve in people that was not twisted. He happened to be gifted with the ability to speak to the hearts of others and make an adventure even from a simple life event. His stories were fascinating, his personality captivating.

So many people are bound to devote every hour of their life to the task they do not like, their glances repressed, their voices hushed. Life goes on for them without delight, only evasions and negations, saving cramps of moments to be with dear people and back to the artificial toils of working life. Do not be negative about your dreams. Start as a hobby and step by step make every effort to help it become dominant in your professional life. Only when you do what you love you live freely, not working anymore but enjoying every day you devote to your favorite venture, that now earns you a living.

Conclusion

Your enthusiasm, your violent likes drive your life and assert themselves in all the every-day occupations of it. Work should be a prolonged festival. Every trial and obstacle should acquire celebrity by their defeat. Find a story that inspires you and a person that motivates you. Do not lose inquisitive and experimental quality and always boost every intellectual pace of your mind. Read and research, share your ideas and look for the advice from people who already at the point of their life where you are aiming to go.

Stay tuned…

Personal Growth

I Found 7 Profound Reasons to Be Patient, and It Saved My Family

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Consider hardships as blessings, rejoice at the opportunity to exercise your patience

I found patience at a crisis in my life… the blessing that greeted my nature – Olya Aman

Only three years ago I used to be so mild and gentle, so sweet and good-humored that earth seemed not my element. My cheerful, happy smile was always present for my beloved husband and baby, my firstborn child. Every minute lived in our home seemed delicious.

All vanished gradually like a breeze, leaving a sign of warmth in the frosty air. I decided to work from home on some company projects rather than going to the office every day. I was delighted to spend more time with my growing family, a second child being on his way.

1) Stay strong when marks of quietness and uneventfulness color your life.

Our third son was a piece of happy, unexpected news. I didn’t fully recover mentally from the merry sensation of being with my second baby, only a year at that time. In the beginning, straggling to be everywhere: keeping the kids nice and neat, the house cozy and welcoming, the food tasty and nourishing — I reduced my restful, sleeping hours to about four a day, comforting myself with thoughts about excellence and perfection of my life.

In three months I felt as if I was groping forward a few steps in my daily life and strolling backward with increasing speed. The little one cried almost every night with no obvious reason. I often lost my temper with my four-year-old, expecting him to be always handy and ready to help in any possible way with kids and with things around the house.

The growing family forced my husband to accept an offer of higher pay and longer absence from home, often being away on his business trips for weeks in a row. Left alone with kids I could not find energy enough to keep my old acquaintances and friends. I was busy and very lonely.

Patience — a lifelong spiritual practice. Do not let time rob you of your brightness, but let it add depth to your personality. Get skilled at pulling the ropes and handling the ribbons of your emotional strength, so you can control your life with all its waiting, watching, and knowing time.

2) Fight snappy conduct that is stealing out with noiseless distracting footsteps.

I kept reproaching myself for lack of attention to my husband and kids. I knew that I needed to be careful about how I dealt with those about me. Too often I ended up snappish in my manner.

The atmosphere at home became suffocating. I and my husband took what seemed to us a strict line of duty: him — providing for the wellbeing of our family, and I — devoting myself fully to the kids. And although our generous impulses had the best intentions, the outcome didn’t provide lasting happiness.

Patience — a way to transform frustration. In this blissful state, you grow familiar and confidential with your beloved people. You have a larger and more loving view when determining the right word and action.

3) Withstand frugal life and hardships.

I was aching to the distant time of those happy days when my husband was at home every night, lifting the weight of troubles by his help and loving support. The tears I shed on the occasion of his coming home from another business trip caused the sacred emotional transformation. A feeble stream of our family life needed to be revived anew, and the only solution was to reunite our family, sacrificing some pleasant but unnecessary luxuries on the way.

My husband decided to go back to his old employment with lower pay and higher healthy, meaningful time spent with his family. With each day at home and each family dinner, the healthy and benign atmosphere was coming back to the house, the chores hanged lighter on my hands.

Patience — a re-attuning to intuition. It is a way to be happy when alive and breathing, even though life may seem hard and frustrations pressing. Without patience you feel like the little tottering, stumbling, clutching child that cries bitterly when left without promised candy.

4) Feel radiance from a disappointing fall.

We abandoned our expensive car for a cheaper and a trifle less comfortable one and our pompous yearly vacations for a lovely countryside escape. When a chain of unlucky events at my husband’s work culminated in his losing the position, we didn’t despair. We lived out of our humble savings and occasional company commissions that I still received now and then.

My husband freed up from the necessity to go every day to the office finally could devote his time to his music experiments. He used to compose wonderful pieces when in college. His hobby didn’t excite much approval from his parents, and he abandoned it almost completely during the years of his company work.

Patience — a way to respond to setbacks and failure. It teaches you to turn your thoughts swiftly upon every blessing in your life, so you stop pitying yourself and fight for your place under this sun. You gather waiting, watching, and knowing skills — and reflect the wise acceptance of the inevitable, and respond to disappointment with grace.

5) Attempt to get to a distant glimmer of perfection.

My husband was shutting himself up in his study at night, interrupting his work for rounds with our crying son. The little creature grew quieter with time, sensing my increasing tranquility. I had my full night’s sleep thanks to my husband’s loving help. Our older son got much attached to his father with his bedtime stories and childish fighting games.

Sometimes the artistic progress was dishearteningly slow. Producing music, though, became more familiar with each failing attempt at reaching the desired effect. I believed in his talent and future success. I encouraged his persistent work.

Patience — a high tolerance for delay. You feel perfect timing for implementing your ideas. For people deprived of patience, it is hard to begin any project, the prospects seem vague, tangled, chaotic and the entire process exceedingly disturbing.

6) Delay gratification. It’ll make the achievement sweeter.

The daily treadmill of our home life was sweet and enchanting, notwithstanding the portioned to us hardships. I liked to see my husband, to hear him about the place and at his music work.

One year left us with a feeling that we’ve accomplished a lot of good for our family, which no money could buy. The second year brought the first small yet increasingly delightful music projects. My husband and a few of his college friends got back together and created a small-movie company.

Patience — an ability to delay gratification. Once you find enough of it within yourself you develop a sensuous susceptibility to timing. You recognize the perfect moment for each important step in your life, and if you feel that time is not right — you can wait without frustration.

7) Avoid procrastination and lend yourself to fulfilling your dream.

All three of their movies presented at the festivals didn’t gain recognition. My husband became an instigator and a powerful motivator for his small company lot. They often got together at our family dinner table to discuss future projects and share the inspirational vibe between them.

His music grew strange, turbulent and insistent, soft and plaintive — and the movie they produced with not much money but with great blissful inspiration became a winner.

Patience — a way to greater inward wisdom. Take the wiser part of grasping at every opportunity to use the capacity to tolerate suffering, and with steady tread go to every trial on the way to your dream.

Conclusion

Patience — active, powerful state. Life without patience is an eternity of torture. Patience thrashes reason into you and evokes absolute devotion to the life itself with everything that makes this experience fascinating.

This is a great practice of compassion. With it, you can always find a way to a non-irritable and non-hostile place within yourself.

Never be entreated to leave this peaceful place. All fears, and hopes, and wild emotions subside and do not jostle and chase each other through your mind when you redeem your ability to tolerate and endure.

Stay tuned…

Personal Growth

6 Powerful Tips to Attract Success and Happiness

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“Unique personal style, dear friend, depends on what lies between the core of your heart and the inner essence of your soul,” said G. gleefully.

When it costs a heart and a dime…

G. at her 47 seemed to have something of a girl whose life was a sponge that was thirstily absorbing every drop of friendly sentiment. She gazed about herself with a saddened eye but swelled with smiles at the first bead of love.

Her face had that unmoved serenity of Nefertiti by Thutmose when in reverie, and that was the state I most often found her in. Regular comely features, glistening chestnut eyes, strict rather big mouth, and graceful cheekbones – her face whispered about flexible elegance and luxuriant beauty. Tall, robust, well-built, but rather disproportionally big in comparison to the head, G’s body would have been regarded as fine-looking by one and quite overweight by the other.

She was one of the most conspicuous women in Paris or even in France itself, and that country supplied so many excellent ladies. One would feel almost giddy with cheerful sensations seeing the splendor of color and exquisiteness of accessories. G. was a merry person and her joy would overflow, not in facial expressions, but in fashionable ejaculations.

Her handmade garments were supplied with an invoice for a bond of friendship to the ones she loved. I was flattered to be given the most beautiful garbs by her hand. Wearing those I strolled around with a bit exaggerated swagger because I knew that I was irresistible.

1) The Timing Scent in the Air

G. always rushed to the attack of a difficulty, and when the top 7 fashionable schools said ‘No’ to her inquiry to be the chosen one to master the craft of couture dress, she didn’t repent. After studying the Design Route very closely, she saw that there was but one alternative for her – to start her own business at new luxury couture in knitted women’s wear.

She was deeply versed in learning the fashion world since she remembered herself. Her dream was fearfully big – to become a world known fashion designer, the one that might proudly take place beside Coco Chanel, Yves Saint Laurent, and Jean-Paul Gaultier. That passion of hers condemned her to be the butt of all boorish jokes of her classmates, but she didn’t repent, growing astir, more from the opposition than from good encouragements.

G. hunted for related material in every French magazine, she went through all available case studies from leading fashion companies with the top-notch education. G.’s goal was to sharpen her senses, to overcharge them with delicious fashion flavor, and develop a plan of a step by step image building technique.

To thrive and prosper under this sun one needs a united care of a great idea and a suitable time for its realization. The balmy days for a particular dream make the fulfillment of it speedier. All things and people should be glad to meet this newness that one has to offer and flourish with its gradual achievement.

2) Industry Intelligence

G. had greedy teeth behind her fashion obsession. She saw her success in every direction, her imagination had a free play and she started her research full of delightful excitement. She was a whippersnapper in terms of color, having no idea about the existence of four color seasons that coincide individually with a particular facial hue, and each subdivided into four subtypes. G. found the colors that did justice to her cool complexion, emphasizing her beauty rather than concealing it by pupping up instead.

G. strove to change simple color presumptions that she had into certainties, so she could call up before her mind’s eye the right combination for any person. In a perfect frenzy of passionate interest, she tended every piece of relevant information, filling in her notebook and her memory.

When the predictions about some problem that majority of people is facing and looking for the solution is but too well verified and you have the answer, make sure that nothing is omitted, and little is undone in terms of research in the very industry you want to step into. You should not feel the task too difficult of performance, devote enough time to it so that nothing is forgotten, and not a thing is regretted.

3) Great Listening Impulses

G. got into every conversation that could take a convivial and improving turn. This way she learned about the magic of proportionately enhancing looks by knowing body expression. To craft a better-looking silhouette, she went into every free seminar that ready-to-wear groups generously provided. One of the students of Louis Vuitton luxury fashion house agreed to share her class notes for the benefit of ordering some accentual work for her collection, G. gladly exchanged her time and made a beautiful handmade lace for her friend’s dresses and got treasured information in return.

She didn’t think long and hard to determine her body outline. Five types left not much to be confused about and pretty clearly told their story. She was a piquant apple and was in love with that shape. After all, that was the easiest topic to master in fashion design. Now she had the tools to tweak an outfit to emphasize her personal style and to help others to get the understanding of their body structure.

4) Unique and Expected Over Head and Toes

Since five years old G. found herself over head and ears in a pack of yarn whenever her mom’s watchful eye was distracted. She loved that sensation of different textures on her tiny hands. The heart of a girl, whose life was circling around the lovely scenes of her mother always at work knitting all kinds of garments for local people of her little town, was forever given to this crafty art.

G. could live frugally but happy on the proceeds of her skillful hands. Her dream, though, was big and she sometimes feared the heights she wanted to reach. But her belief was strong and sturdy, and the energy with which it was expressed was impatient of delay and suspense.

Competition is healthy only to a particular extent. If the problem that people are facing is solved in too many similar ways, the chance of success is proportionally diminished. Your solution should to all appearances stand out and be unique, better in many ways than whatever others have to offer. Ease the people’s minds by your discovery, give them the most poignant bliss with the answer you provide.

5) Hunting for Branding and Presentation

The horizon was beginning to crimson when French magazine L’Etudiant featured G.’s first collection. She worked hard to turn her passion into profitable business. It was not easy to find her niche but she managed to make a successful living by doing what she loved. She found her own signature style and the patterns she designed were original and caught attention. G. was able to access key forces to assist her in achieving her dream and every succeeding collection she presented was better than the previous one.

6) Fruitful Partnership

G. collaborated with many talented fashion designers and learned a lot during their mutual eclectic teamwork. She tenderly cherished each encounter and became close friends with many interesting people in the beauty industry: photographers, makeup artists, models, and of course brilliant designers from outstanding schools.

One will well advance in life if cooperates with the right people on his way. The very intelligence, that a few brains united together under one mutual concept, can deliver will for sure shine bright enough to light up the sky. In faith, I believe one great person can substitute an excessive monetary capital. So engaging yourself busily in finding worthy business partners is a path for exultation.

Conclusion

G.’s work considered by many as the great art in haute couture designs. And being on the top of her career she continued to revert her thoughts to her old friends. I’m a proud possessor of a few signature garments that G. gifted me with. And ‘haute couture’ or not… I feel the love of her generous soul and that is the most precious and priceless.

Let your dream grasp you with an iron hand. The path to it should be remembered even in old age. A life of persistent and not fleeting pleasure is dearly paid for by tenacious movement to the desired. And fear often is a companion to the assurance on this way – fear that the dream is too big and assurance that it is for sure reachable. Your cleverness and your soul capital are on the service of it. Make it sensational so people will have a daily renewed appetite for what you have to offer.

Stay tuned…

Personal Growth

Get Threatening Charisma on Pain of a Discovering Journey

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Explore the unknown places and learn about yourself

You’ll gaze with awe at me… – Olya Aman

Supreme importance of charisma

Deep blue eyes and a little scar. The natural grace of my person and that deep voice with a slight wheeze, as if it was broken and never fixed properly. I have that nervous organization that makes one think I am constantly struggling with myself. You will be put out by my peculiarities when you first see me.

I receive every person gruffly enough to avert any foolery towards me. But the atmosphere around me is so healthy and benign after just a moment‘s reflection that every fine-bodied specimen of humankind cannot resist my natural magnetism.

My story is fascinating. So Bent your listening ear to the faintest sound of my charismatic voice…

Become your own faithful friend.

When young and inexperienced, we have a very limited view on ourselves. Often lost in self-doubt, we timidly make unpropitious choices. To avert most misfortunes is to never derogate from every opportunity to learn about ourselves. When your perception goes to many countries and discovers many human characters, the despairing voice of private doubtful thoughts becomes less and less audible until it finds no echo in your soul.

I spent all my childhood years in my native little cozy house in rural Germany. My parents as two faithful guardians kept close watch over their only beloved child, not letting me wander too far from their watchful lead.

I dreamt about courageous travel enterprises, and a world map on my bedroom wall was my devoted comforter. No wonder my favorite subject in school was geography. I could not have enough of every bit of information about the places I wanted to visit.

My mom was not indifferent to my lamentations, but my dad was out of all positive spirits when I announced to them that I’d saved enough money from my laboring vacations to go around the world. By-the-by they used to the idea and offered me a deal that was going to save peace between us.

I had one year right after finishing high school to do what I pleased, but when the time was up, I had to submit to their order and enter the university they’d already picked for me.

Get rid of your private misgivings.

Often the lack of first-hand impressions, that only traveling experience can provide, goes hand in hand with the lack of life-defining self-knowledge. People and places, above all things, teach us to rise to our misfortunes and feel genuine pride for what we do and who we are, and without those, life may be doomed to disappointment.

It dumb-founders my mind now to think about all the self-doubts I had. I left my country being scared as a sheep going right to the claws of a wolf. I was exploding with private misgivings.

Well… To tell the truth, there was not much for me to be worried about, my parents being over productive and overthinking every little thing about my bon-voyage. I had a place to stay in each country on my list: close mother’s friend here, old father’s coworker there, a third cousin of my grandma’s younger sister, a respectable host family… and so on and on and on.

In three months and seven countries, I was driven to my wit’s end by hospitality and predictability and went astray with my plan.

And that when the self-discovery journey began.

Discover new places and get into self-digging.

Most people find themselves hindered in believing that the choice made for them by someone they trust and love is the most prudent and favorable. Disquietude becomes a daily companion for these people and they often find themselves sunk in deepest thought about all other scenarios that could have been possible and most likely happy.

India by far was the most interesting place I visited. This country taught me to love my blunders rather than being ashamed of them. At any rate, they suited me admirably. I mixed words and time-zones; I forgot names and numbers; I got lost in wonderings and markets… but I was good-tempered and compassionate — and those were the only valuable things needed in the country where heart treasures reign over any material possessions.

Now I can see clearly that if I hadn’t made mistakes at that time, I would’ve failed in becoming who I am today. I was finally disposed to favor myself to the utmost not ‘despite of’ but ‘even if’ finding myself tripping.

Traverse the countries and occupations.

Traveling helps to obtain a commanding view on all the possible scenarios in life. By trying new things and learning new skills, we get a better picture of how other people make their living. There is no other way to know if you like it unless you do it, even if for a short time.

Halfway to Sydney, Australia, and a half through the predetermined traveling year, I got tired of misnomers. In France I was a writer, a true worshiper of Hemingway; in Spain I dared play Gaudi; in Italy — Michelangelo; a philosopher in Greece, a detective in England, a politician in Ireland…

I gave myself enough concern on the subject and scrupulously went through my abilities and preferences. Outfits and movies were my bug-bear faults. This passion I decided to transform to dexterity in the next six months I still had to myself. I needed to provide valuable and doubtless proof of my talents so that my dear parents could agree that successful leaving was possible in this occupation. And here I am — a film costume designer.

Beguile the time with valuable encounters.

One worthy encounter can open up a prospect of a brilliant future. The material advantages of some fortune cannot compete with a good conversation that makes the burning ambition possess the person and make him conquer the dream of his life. In the nature of things, people are more costly than any soulless things. So let the new encounters be incessantly renewed in your life.

I worked on many film sets. Found great connections, many acquaintances, and a few friends. I longed to tear away this industry and endured many inclemencies along the way. I was kicked out of my first place in Sydney where I traversed with one of the leading actors trying to push through his objections my vision of his character’s look.

I spent two months in Moscow helping to film a comedy series. My life there was full of daring and chivalry when I was in love, and incessant doubt and torturing suspense when the euphoria ended.

Just an outside observer in China, no one willing to take an apprentice with no language skills what so ever. An errand girl in Canada and an assistant to the Costume Director in Hollywood. Many places, many characters, a load of co-existing experience, and quite a bit in the trade itself.

Become a guru in your trade.

The wealth of feeling — love to your chosen career, should be a cult — the accelerator that drives you to improve yourself constantly and elbow your way through any difficulties to the desired height. The cup of that struggle to learn should leave a sweetness of illustrious improvement on your lips.

Often I find myself in a supernatural aberration of mind that induces me to see the characters, especially if it is historical or fantasy movies. Those are my favorite. I enjoy every day of my life and consider myself endowed in an eminent degree.

This is why you should travel

Traveling by far is the best generator of positive developing stresses in life. The scenes our senses go through should be bewildering sometimes, stunning often, and gloomy now and then.

There is no need to run to and fro and burst in and out in life — you will always be the better (as the case might be for a thoughtful voyage) when gratified by new encounters, in a frenzy of love to nature, and seeing the distinct glimmer of your dream coming true. Explore the unknown places and learn about yourself on the way to every destination.

Stay tuned…

Personal Growth

4 Healing Properties of a Good Book

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Revelation of an Elderly Wizard

Reading Life Straight Through

When a large enough supply of tears was forced into my eyes by some hydraulic process my parents finally agreed to let me go to an evening afterschool class for little tricksters. Many elders considered it a waste of time. And W. (being a lean, long-backed, stiff-necked, with great quantity of snow-white hair everywhere old weirdo, who had forsaken his daily respectable employment for a dubious occupation as a magic teacher) didn’t excite a qualified approval from majority of our villagers.

He was a man that turned over the leaf of his life to bring about a new happy page. He left his work after the death of his wife because he decided to fulfill his childhood greatest dream. I was tended with his kindness and solicitude when those suspicious but respectable circumstances brought me to his care. He became an old wizard and I was his little assistant.

Our conversations always took a very improving turn. We talked about my cares for the present, anxieties for the future, and his troubles from the past. His life, although realized to the full contentment of it only at a dusk of his age, was an expression of gentle and quiet happiness, organized in an orderly and neatly manner.

1) Waive the Magic Literary Wand

W. had a heart large enough for any three old folks as himself and no kids of his own to bestow his devotion and love on. When his wife died even his boots started to creak in a very sad and lonely manner. His countenance underwent a great variety of gloomy contortions. He needed to replenish the empty space. Reading books became his salvation. Now, retiring himself from work, he had enough time to spend on things he loved and never prior to these days had an opportunity to devote himself to.

A life can be revolutionized by a good book. After some reflection everyone would agree that it is never late to replace feeble narrow-mindedness with eagerness of perception. And that enthusiastic approach to life can be achieved by simply turning the pages of a RIGHT book.

Reading about self-development (for example some volume by the pen of Dr. Wayne Dyer) will lend fresh vigor to someone’s life. This kind of literature calls into view all the blessings we have and reminds us to be grateful.

A murmur of admiration is running through your essence when you read the outpouring revelations of a beautiful soul.

2) Enchant Your Mood

W. had a strong appetite for science fiction, fantasy, and mystery books. And no one could dare to talk about magic without due respect in his presence. He would put an injured look right away – this topic being his favorite. W. decided to heighten his cognitive abilities as well as train his brain to the craft of diverting his attention from depressing thoughts. He started his literary journey of recovery with a few books about tricks and magic by his bedside.

It is so natural to triumph over life difficulties by burying yourself in the pages of a book that always makes you feel good. Any time you feel like the world has been turned upside down, grab that read of yours – put the world right-side up and calm your over-wrought nerves.

A person who rocks his monotonous existence to and fro can banter himself with the pages about lives and trials of great adventurers like those that Jules Verne depicted. A daily renewed appetite for fresh sensation will most likely be satisfied by a detective story that Arthur Conan Doyle or Agatha Christie wrote. Anne and Charlotte Bronte as well as Jane Austen will put you in a fit of loving enthusiasm and excitement that will cure your wearied heart and brain.

There is a book for every temperament and mood that with half-paternal attention will be guarding your inner peace and wellbeing.

3) Be Charmed by a Variety

W. claimed to be out-and-out an expert in the art of multi-reading. He had a mood-uplifting book when thoughts about his poor wife came around. Another cheerful read saved him from getting too bored on a lonely evening. And when he felt eager to learn something new he grasped at a great masterpiece of authorship (as he considered this book), which was “A Tutorial for Young Wizards” by an anonymous author.

Try your utmost to master the great art of modifying the vibrations of your mood. Nowadays it is easier to be done than ever before. Although, our patience is getting tried more often by the speed of life. So, all the better, we need to become experts in self-help techniques.

Download on your phone the best uplifting, funny, brain-developing, and peace-creating specimens in the literary world and control the level of positivity by reading a little of each book at the right moment. Waiting in a doctor’s office, a bit nervous – humorous dialog on a page is a great prescription in this case. Feeling tension after a meeting with your boss – some meditative message will for sure open your heart for lighter feelings. Bored and lonely at home – time to learn something new to be able to converse on interesting topics and consequently finding new friends to brighten your melancholy dusk hours.

There is a solution for every problem that is already written by some wise man. Find a book that renews your vehemence and let your mood to be of incomparable docility when you read it.

4) Stay Delighted When in Motion

The intricacies of wizards’ lives were always throwing W.’s thoughts into condition close to delirium. One day, driving in his truck and listening to an audiobook about traveling circus, an idea corrupted his mind. At that moment he realized how he can grasp at happiness. His childhood dream appeared less and less chimerical.

Conclusion

When a child W. used to always talk about being a Magician one day. His parents grew heated with angry desperation to bring him to a sober mind and his desire grew softer till completely killed by opposition. He started to ruminate on his old dream while listening to that audio. A glimmer of a solution came to his mind when he visited our village school performance on some occasion or other. W., holding his dream fast by the hand, talked with his old friend who happened to be the director of our school at that time, and started an evening ‘Young Magicians’ club. Up went W.’s life when out and about went his little trickster-pupils…I was one of them.

We have to become high-class experts in self-learning and development. Let us look facts in the face, nowadays our employments are too numerous, our leisure hours – too precious, and that is the reason why we need to do our utmost to preserve ourselves from wasting our time on anything that tires and distresses us.

Grabbing after great improving read is an elevating self-therapy. Any life, be it a drab-color or overdense-color one, can be cured with a good book. It may seem a fatiguing mission to the one who didn’t flip through many pages. But once you’ve found your own Scheherazade, life stops running helter-skelter and gets in a peaceful order.

Stay tuned…

Personal Growth

In a Field of Battle With Regret, You Must Either Slay or Be Slain

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My boss fell in love with me and laid me off

Regret made me goofy. Sorrow gave me an enigmatic flavor. – Olya Aman

I was out of heart

The existence of conscience makes the claws of regret sharp. And the stronger one, the deeper the other can penetrate a sensitive flesh. The depressing influence of this feeling creates the sensation of a jail in a living body. This emotion casts a grim look on life. The damp atmosphere that regret creates is suffocating. We need to learn how to dispel the smog from the past and at the same time to keep our hearts from being dried-up.

I was out of humor and out of heart. It has been almost two years now, but my grief grew fast and furious with every succeeding year. My best friend, the one I was secretly in love with, died from heart failure. Miraculously, we were at the stop sign when it happened, the horn of a car announced the death. His innocent and pathetic face was radiant with new happiness. I couldn’t help wondering how he could be so glad to leave me alone. Sitting on a front passenger seat, I unconsciously called to mind a portrait I saw in a gallery some years ago. The painter neglected the background, reserving all the magic of his brush for the quiet, happy face of a man. My friend at that moment looked just like him, as if he had caught the golden glory of heaven on his countenance.

Arm-wrestling with the past

The catastrophes of previous days can darken with a shade of remorse the future ones. Some deeds are done impetuously, others are out of our control. To weather those storms of life and not to be worn out is the actual purpose of their existence. There is no way to change what’s done, so no need to stamp life with the print of past adversities.

He felt discomfort in his chest for a few weeks before the terrible culmination on that day. I mentioned to him several times that he needed to see a doctor. I blamed myself for lack of persistence. And the regret I felt had a sensation of almost maternal protection. Its watchful eye never left my side. It didn’t let my mind wander elsewhere. Some days I could feel the throbbing of his heart as if he was pressed in an affectionate embrace close to my chest. Those days were worse than others.

I would do impossibilities to bring him back. I owed my happiness to him. It felt like an explosion now when he was gone. And I could not pick up the fragments with all the care of an antiquary I applied. I became stifle. My mind and soul were on fire, and that blaze seemed to gleam from hell. There was no space left for new emotions.

That dark, evening power that dominated in my life had some magnetic energy that attracted empathetic people. There are some ways of looking at you that seem to penetrate your soul. I looked at people and made them feel as though they had nothing on. That irritated a lot and captivated many. After all, that sorrow I endured gave me that Renaissance’s ‘Juliet’ flavor. And my gloomy voice could talk the language of enigmatic gallantry of that time.

I often was behind handed with my work, but my senior manager closed his eyes on every mismatch in my schedule. The tension was growing. I could not see the outpouring lava of affection that I excited. My handsome boss was on fire, like a human volcano he loved me with the fierce of unchained nature.

But I was a different person after 2 years of mourning. I gazed about me with a saddened eye, paying attention to the dim side of life. That desire to expand every misfortune in daily life and minimize the impact of many little jolly things was roasting me alive. I needed thunder and lightning to wake me up and transform that death-like, sepulchral look into my regular prior-to-the-fatal-day features.

My heart finally spoke to me, and I happened to take to it. The blow of losing a job served as a curing disaster that shook my essence. When enough time was given to self-wandering, I realized that there were still pages in my life book that I had not read.

Let me tell you what I’ve found on those pages

Arm-wrestling with the past is an exhausting and worthless process. A positive view on days-by-gone creates a profusion of loving energy that motivates a person in his life. Occurrence in the past, bad or good, is a wonderful lesson that builds personality. Everyone is unique because every experience is individual. The way one interprets it determines his success or failure in life. There is no way to change the past, but altering your attitude towards it is magical.

Give a new turn to your thoughts

To be more ardent, more eloquent, more entrancing is a process of growth that often goes hand in hand with ill luck and pain. For the sake of my future happy life, I’ve decided to respect my past. That experience was a tombstone that kept the castle of my unique personality firm and steady. In the enormous mileage of the past, everything is a blessing. Tears poured over some broken expectations should teach a lesson of breathing through the pain and moving with a renewed and re-skilled hope.

Revert the importance

Life is cooler when sometimes less weight is given to the important and more value devoted to the trifling little jolly things. So, in other words, performing a blah with sarcastic importance and taking important for a mumbo-jumbo is quite a good key to a lighter step in life. Various pieces of information assemble the personality and it just happens so that misfortunes give a more positive outcome in terms of helpful life tools than merry experiences could have done.

Let the past be your capital

Trudging timidly through life was a punishment that I inflicted on myself when consciously dwelled on the past with disappointment in my mind. I decided to consider my past experience as a capital that can help me to take the right turn in the right moment in the future.

The result proved to be magnificent

I do not have greedy teeth for blessings, but always remember to be grateful for every little merry moment. That is why life is good-natured to me now. Happiness is the poetry spoken in a woman’s voice. I had my second chance to hear the poem of my life.

Now I and my ex-boss listen to those delicious sounds together.

Stay tuned…